I’m Turning 50 … & I think that it’s actually ok
I am turning 50 this month … and I think that it is, kind of, ok.
I’m not going to lie … I’ve spent much of the last 12 months dragging my (six inch) heels kicking and screaming, and having petulant moments of denial the closer I get to ‘the milestone’.
But, somewhere along the line, I seem to have lost the feeling of imminent dread that has been heading towards me like a Mack truck since turning 49.
In fact, despite my turbulent relationship with getting older, my ‘vintage’ has got me thinking this age is actually pretty great.
And here are 10 reasons why.
1) 50 is the new 30. Ok 35. Alright damn it, it is the new 40.
I’ve been looking at recent red carpet photos of the likes of Demi Moore (aged 62) , J-Lo (54), Jennifer Garner (52), Eva Longoria (50) and so on. And damn they are looking fine. I don’t look at their pics and go “Urgh, that is impossible, women at that age don’t really look like that.’ I am more like ‘Hell yes – keep rocking those biceps at 50 you good thing’ … and then get-re-motivated to hit the gym all over again.
Celebrity motivation aside, one thing I know is that I’ll never let age control my love of all things vanity-related. Shallow, yes. But, alas, also me.
Stuff the “rule” about not having long hair after 40, or finding power in embracing your greys, or transitioning to sensible flats at middle-age.
All I know is that they will be prying those heels off me in aged care I tell you.
Eva Longoria just turned 50 and celebrated by doing this photo shoot. *It’s ok mum and dad, I will not be doing the same thing
2) After the angsty 20s and 30s, you’ve gotten to the point (usually your fourth or fifth decade) where you realise that you should just do whatever you want … because guess what … no one gives a f&@k.
Truly. Everyone has their own issues, so I have learnt that you should just do what you want .. and move on.
3) The kids are older, more self-reliant, and you have gained yourself new best buddies.
One of my daughters is 25 and the other is 12, and honestly it is like having two little besties for life. One is my constant sounding board (“No, that is a shit decision mum and you will regret your life if you do it”), and the other is my cheerleader (“But mumma you’re STILL SO YOUNG”). Guess which child I love more? (Joking!!)
My cheerleaders and biggest critics
4) I have actually started to envision what life might be like in retirement.
Once upon a time it seemed like a lifetime away, and the thought of it seemed depressing and lonely to me. Now I swear, all my partner and I ever talk about is what country we want to live in when we don’t have to work anymore, and if we’ll have two scooters in Bali, or one.
Envisioning life in Bali
6) I have fallen in love with the gym all over again!
Now hear me out, because I realise I sound like a fitness w*&nker, but I promise I’m not (I still eat gluten, stacks of chocolate and have no intolerances).
I have had a love/hate relationship with the gym all my life.
But in our ripe 40s and 50s, my partner and I have made it a hugely important part of our lives that really connects us.
We don’t want to go to a pub after work anymore – the pub is our gym!
We also love being smug on a Saturday morning instead of hungover for 25 days straight.
7) You get to have a mid-life crisis and stuff what anyone says!
I just went through one … but instead of buying a sports car or giving myself a purple coloured crew cut … I BOUGHT A PUPPY.
Our new puppy Lola
8) Little things make me happy now. Like when someone calls me “miss” instead of “maam”.
9) You let go of some friendships, and it doesn’t bother you too much.
As you get older you realise you don’t need LOTS of friends – just GOOD ones. Ones that will have your back, are loyal and are always there to pick up the phone no matter how much time you’ve spent apart. If there is one life lesson I’m giving my girls it is just that.
A smaller and fiercely loyal friendship group is priceless. Know your tribe and pick them well. Even if it is just one close girlfriend.
My best friend in the whole wide world and I met when we were 11 at Greek dancing class. She is one of only a handful of mates I call on when I need to chat, and I would not have it any other way.
Hamming it up with the original gangsta (circa 1998-ish)
10) The happiness curve.
Life starts to look up again at 50. There is research proving it! The theory is that life satisfaction falls around the late 40s, before picking up again and people feeling happier into their 50s and beyond.
Apparently it has a lot to do with shifting priorities, increased wisdom and generally having greater contentment because of lower expectations.
In fact some studies even suggest people are happier in their 60s and beyond than they were in their youth!
Ha. I’ll take that, and bring on 60 I say!